DONALD IS GOAT

 Donald is a living legend and his quotes are legendary.

It cracks me up that every time I mock the orange clown a bunch of Americans spit the dummy and think that because I'm not into Captain Chump I must be a "Demorat"... 

No, it doesn't work like that, I think they are all a bunch of clowns doing a stage show designed to distract us.

Here are some great quotes by "The Don" to distract us:

“People don’t realize how smart I am. Really smart.”

 “I don’t like critics. Critics are people that haven’t achieved as much as I have.”

“To be blunt, people would vote for me. They just would. Why? Maybe because I’m so good looking.”

 “I could stand in the middle of 5th Avenue and shoot somebody and I wouldn’t lose voters.”

“Our country is in serious trouble. We don’t have victories any more. We used to have victories but [now] we don’t have them. When was the last time anybody saw us beating, let’s say, China, in a trade deal? They kill us. I beat China all the time. All the time.”

 “I have very good words. I’ve got the best words.”

 “I know a lot of people that go to Tesco, and they’re dangerous.”

 “Nobody has better respect for intelligence than Donald Trump.”

 “While Bette Midler is an extremely unattractive woman, I refuse to say that because I always insist on being politically correct.”

 “In life you have to rely on the past, and that’s called history.”

 “She does have a very nice figure… If Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.”

 “Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me ‘old,’ when I would NEVER call him ‘short and fat?’ Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend – and maybe someday that will happen!”

 “I could talk for hours. Everyone loves to listen to me.”

 “People love me in Ireland. The Irish love me. They love me for my name, Trump. Because when they see my name they think excellence.”

“These deals were so bad, only I could’ve fixed them.” 

“If you look at the statistics, the statistics show… I mean, I’m just stating facts, I’m very factual. The statistics are there.” 

 “I know a lot of tough people that are stupid.”

“Well, I’m not saying yes. I’m saying no. But maybe.”

 “There was nobody tougher on Russia than me, nobody.” 

“Ice cream, I always get two scoops.”